breastfeeding or formula? how to make the best choice for you and your family from a breastfeeding mom

my advice on the approach to take when feeding your baby, based on my 3 experiences with my own children.

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introduction

A decision you are already contemplating before giving birth is how you will feed your baby. Will you breastfeed, use formula, or a mix of both? Some are forced to make a decision alternate than what they planned due to low supply, pain, lip or tongue ties, returning to work, and so on. Before I dive in, I want to preface: FED IS BEST. This is your choice for your baby, for your family, and for you.

I’ve thought this through with my 3 children and had different approaches for each. Each worked for me in different seasons for different reasons – one (almost) exclusively formula fed, one exclusively breastfed for 6 months and moved to formula, and one exclusively breastfed. I’ll go through pros and cons, and will end the post with polite ways to combat questions or judgment from loved ones and strangers alike.

benefits of breastfeeding

Nutritional & Health Advantages

Breast milk is rich in essential nutrients and antibodies as it supports immune system development and reduces risk of infections. Your body is working hard to protect your baby! We have vaccinated our children, however if you are hesitant you have relief in some of your protection that’s passed through breastmilk.

When breastfeeding, there are lower risk of allergies, asthma, ear infections, and digestive issues, along with long-term benefits such as reduced risk of obesity and diabetes. Breastfeeding aids postpartum recovery by helping the uterus contract, bringing your body back to health quickly. Breastfeeding also lowers the risk of breast and ovarian cancer.

2. Cost-Effectiveness

There are no direct costs, making it more affordable than formula. However there are general costs to consider. First, the food and diet of mom will improve breastfeeding results. Breastfeeding women need 500 more calories in their diet to support their growing baby. Second, any supplies associated with breastfeeding come with a cost – this includes manual or electric breast pumps (if not covered by insurance), nipple pads, nursing bras or tank tops, nipple cream, silverettes, nursing covers, and so on. PRO TIP: you can use swaddle blankets as a nursing cover! Save yourself some dough.

Breastfeeding can also reduce healthcare costs due to fewer baby illnesses. However, this varies greatly if you have other children in the home or are taking them to daycare.

3. Bonding and Emotional Connection

Breastfeeding promotes mother-baby bonding through skin-to-skin contact. Skin-to-skin can also be achieved through formula-feeding – you can take a bath with baby and have them lay on you!

If you have doubts about if you’ll connect with your baby, breastfeeding may help. Even if you don’t intend to breastfeed for the whole journey, or even part of it, consider breastfeeding for the golden hour – within the first hour of your baby being born. It’ll calm you both from the stressful birthing experience, stimulates the production of breastmilk, and provides the golden colostrum to your baby!

4. No Prep!!

I have been lucky to find my stride with my third. I say this to say – I appreciate the ease of breastfeeding in comparison to formula or bottle feeding. There’s no prep and minimal cleanup if you are staying at home with the baby. No panicking about running out of formula, no sterilizing or cleaning bottles multiple times a day. It is, by far, my favorite thing about breastfeeding so far.

challenges of breastfeeding

Physical and Emotional Demands

Breastfeeding can be exhausting, especially with frequent feedings. In the first few days the baby will cluster feed. Especially on the second day/night, your breastmilk needs to be stimulated by the baby to come in. During this phase with my youngest, I breastfed 22 times in a single day. With our middle child, we thought something was wrong and that she wasn’t getting milk, so we offered formula. We were half right. There wasn’t milk yet, but breastmilk is by supply and demand. Your baby constantly coming onto the breast is what helps your milk come in and your supply to be maintained.

2. Potential for sore nipples, engorgement, or mastitis.

I am currently dealing with thrush which is making my nipples burn like hot fire! Nipple cream and silverettes are your best friends here. They will soothe your nipples between feedings. This organic nipple cream by Earth Mama doesn’t need to be wiped off before feedings and I swear by it! The silverettes have natural healing properties of silver. I got these from Willow from this breastfeeding kit and like them so far.

3. Time Commitment

Breastfeeding requires a consistent feeding schedule, which can be challenging for working parents. I successfully breastfed and pumped at work with my 2nd up to the 6 month mark. Unfortunately my supply started to drop after going back to work, which can happen.

The US Pump Act allows women to breastfeed while working and may receive paid break time – more info here. States also have their own laws regarding breastfeeding. There are hands-free pumps to make this easier. we got a Willow but a friend recommended a MomCozy and I love the set up much better! The Willow 3.0 has a breastmilk bag that you put into the breast pump itself, which can cause some leakage putting it in and out. It also has a storage capacity of around 4oz per breast. The MomCozy has a spout where you can pour the milk directly into a bottle or a bag (I LOVE this!!), has less parts to clean, and can hold 5.4 oz!!!

PRO TIP: You can use the Aeroflow website to apply for a breast pump and choose a pump according to what insurance covers, purchase out-of-pocket, or combine with insurance + FSA. They also have pregnancy and postpartum supplies, along with breast pump replacements.

You can also request your job’s office has a nursing room set up. You can bring your own pump and store the milk in the refrigerator. If baby is at home with you, even better! Less bottles and cleanup.

4. Dietary and Lifestyle Considerations

Mom’s diet and medications may affect breast milk. Alcohol and caffeine intake need to be monitored.

You may discover normal things in your diet, such as dairy or spicy food, may cause tour baby to be fussy, gassy, restless, or cause more spit up. We are a Nespresso Vertuo household, and I had to switch to decaf Altissio pods as our favorite Cafecito de Puerto Rico is double espresso and was keeping our little girl awake. With our second born, she had an intolerance to dairy that lasted her through to 1.5 years old. She spit up more when I had milk products, and was constipated when we switched to whole milk. We used Lactaid and gradually introduced cheese and yogurt until she could tolerate whole milk.

5. Social and Public Breastfeeding Challenges

Some moms may feel uncomfortable breastfeeding in public. Over the years I’ve seen more private areas become available for nursing moms, especially at zoos and museums. At the Bronx Zoo, they have a nursing pod by the main restaurant. In DisneyWorld, they have a kids area with a nursing room. Sometimes if all you have is a bathroom stall, put some toilet paper on the seat and breastfeed there if you aren’t comfortable. I’ve breastfed in the drivers seat of my car (in park!) when baby was screaming for food and we were not near our destination. I’ve found a lot of success in asking people for a private place to feed and I haven’t been refused so far.

benefits of formula feeding

Convenience and Flexibility

Formula-feeding allows other caregivers to feed the baby easier. If you express breastmilk, you can still have others help with feedings. When dealing with thrush, I expressed milk to give my nipples a break. It is less demanding on the mom when someone else is feeding a mixed formula. You can also store your breastmilk and then thaw/warm it to give yourself a break.

If you put your babies in daycare, you’ll likely have to prep the formula and bottles and label them in a bag. We got a pitcher mixer to help with this with our firstborn, and with our second we invested in the Baby Brezza, which I kept because I loved it. Both were amazing choices and made life easier on us.

2. Less physical demand and more freedom for mom

With formula, there are no issues with sore nipples, engorgement, latching problems, or dietary restrictions. Basically, you can do as you please if you decide to formula feed. You can drink while breastfeeding but it has to be timed right, or you can pump and dump to ensure nothing is expelled into the milk. If formula feeding, this is not a concern. You can put your body on autopilot (for the most part) when formula feeding. I will say in my own experience, breastfeeding help me cut baby weight and heal faster due to baby’s intake of calories and the uterine contracting that takes place during breastfeeding.

3. Measurable Intake

Parents can easily track and quantify exactly how much the baby is consuming. When breastfeeding, you basically lose this visibility unless you use a Haaka or a catcher on the other breast. When formula feeding, what the baby is eating is quantifiable. In both cases, a baby will let you know when they are hungry and when they’re full.

challenges of formula feeding

Cost Considerations

Formula can be expensive over time. Formula can undergo a shortage due to recalls or world conditions.

We gave birth to our first during COVID, and not long after was the bacterial breakout in the Similac facilities which then led to the formula shortage. With our second, after breastfeeding for 6 months we transitioned to Bobbie. We liked this brand a lot, but at the time it was mainly sold online and at Target. It has since expanded to Amazon, Whole Foods, Wegmans, and others. They also offer a subscription service based on an assessment of how much your baby typically eats.

PRO TIP: You should have bottles, a sterilizer, and a pump on hand regardless of the path you intend to go down for feeding your baby. Plans change and you should be prepared for that! It’s possible your baby may not like the bottles that you have in mind.

When we were transitioning from breastfeeding to formula, or when we were sending our children to daycare and they needed bottles for school, we looked up the best bottles for breastfed babies to make our decision. Comotomo came up and it was the most successful with two kids. With our first, we used Philips Avent with the anti reflux inserts and those worked well, but only with her. I highly recommend a baby bottle sample pack like this one from Babylist that you can try out with your baby and narrow it down to one. The most frustrating thing with a hungry, crying baby is having multiple bottle pieces to choose from and then them crying some more when you gave them one that they didn’t like. Save yourself the stress!!

2. Digestion and Sensitivities

Some babies may struggle with formula digestion or allergies, leading to gas or constipation. Ironically, the formulas that were advertised as “gentle” were the ones that made my babies the most fussy. This is a trial and error process, but what worked for us was trying to find formulas that mimicked breastmilk as best as possible. Some people will look to European made formulas as they trust those more than US made ones. In the hospital they offered us Similac, and Similac and Enfamil are the most widely available in bodegas and big box retailers alike. You can use these in a pinch and have them on hand as a backup. Your baby’s digestion, behavior, and diaper changes will best tell you how they like the formula.

BONUS: Ways to respond to loved ones about your feeding choices

We’ve all been there – the overprotective and means well, but may-be-overstepping parent, in-law, relative, friend, acquaintance, or stranger giving you their take on how you feed your baby. We’ve been there! Here are some polite, straight-forward responses we gave when asked why we offered formula, exclusively breastfed, or offered both:

We discussed this extensively and feel this is the best choice for our baby and our family. We appreciate your concern.
We discussed our choice with our pediatrician and they support our decision due to the baby’s health.
I know this comes from a place of love and concern. Please respect our choice as parents as we love our child(ren) just as much and want what’s best for them.
This is the decision that we made at this time; we may change our path in the future.
I was formula-fed and came out just fine.
Thank you for showing that you care about our family.

There’s a lot to consider when making any decisions about your babies – your lifestyle, work schedules, and health considerations. As I said earlier, fed is best!! What matters most is a well-nourished, weight-gaining and happy baby. You should discuss this with your partner and your pediatrician.

Let me know if you found this information helpful!